Fire action

Next to our elevator is a sign telling you what to do in the case of a “fire”. My favorite step (after Step 1: Read this sign) is Step 3:

3. Attack the fire if possible using appliance provided (DO NOT TAKE RISK).

Which leaves me wondering, is it even possible to launch an attack on one of the basic elements of nature using only a blender (or any other appliance that may be at hand)? Maybe if you outflank it. Perhaps if one person feints a direct assault upon the flames, while you and your toaster wait in an enfilading position. Would the person feinting be taking a forbidden risk? Are you only not to take risk if you are actually attacking a fire with an appliance, in which case, we might be ok, as the feinter is only pretending to attack. But what if the feinter has to attack a bit to convince the fire that it is a real attack?

Come to think of it,  “DO NOT TAKE RISK” is a really, really boring life philosophy, which has, thankfully, been thoroughly refuted by the “Whale Tongue Dialogue” from Finding Nemo.

Author: Josh Witten

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