In the spirit of Whose Line is It Anyway?, these lyrics were composed on the fly in response to The Frogger requesting, “Daddy, sing a song about a shark.” Not knowing any songs about sharks, I found myself inspired by the opening scene of Jaws.
*Sung to the tune of “Lily the Pink” as arranged and performed by Dirty Dishes.
Here’s a story, a little bit gory,
A little bit happy, a little bit sad,
About Bru-uce the-e Shar-ark
And how he bit my leg in HALF!
CHORUS
And we’ll drink, we’ll drink, we’ll drink
To Bruce the Shark, the Shark, the Shark
The greatest hunter in the sea-ea-ea
He used his pointy tee-eeth
To bi-ite into me.
I went swimming, at ni-ight
Out upon the sea-ea-ea
When I fel-elt a little tu-ug
Then I was swimming in my BLOOD!
CHORUS
So I turned and swam for shore
But my kick wasn’t stro-o-ong
I looked ba-ack and reali-ized
That half my leg was GONE!
CHORUS
Still I swam for my life
Through the water I did pu-u-ull
And I ho-oped with all my mi-ight
That half a leg would make him FULL.
CHORUS
I collapsed upon the sand
Trading life for le-e-e-e-eg.
Bruce can have that bit o’ me,
Now I have this wooden peg.
CHORUS
TO-O-O BI-ITE INTO ME!

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